Meet Chuck and Pam Haskell.  Chuck and Pam attended church faithfully.  Every time the doors were open, they were there – Sunday School, Sunday morning, Sunday Evening, Wednesday evening, Thursday evening visitation, prayer meeting and revival meetings.  They required their kids to get up early for family devotions, and switched between sending them to Christian Schools and homeschooling.   Pam was involved in the choir, orchestra, and nursery.  Chuck was self-employed, and presented himself as a loving father and husband.  Almost without exception, every time there was a public prayer meeting, Chuck prayed.  He prayed for wicked hearts to repent, and for God to send revival.  He prayed as if he was in the very presence of God himself.  However, Chuck was keeping a secret – for years, he had been molesting his daughter.  In her own words:

     “The entire time my family went to [church], I was being molested by my dad. I left home at 17, and was portrayed as a      rebellious teenager. After I confided in my brother about the abuse, he confronted my dad. My mom stood steadfastly by her husband’s side, seeing me as the problem. In her words, I stole her husband from her… Being made to wake up early for devotions every morning, being made to go witnessing, made to go to church multiple times a week all while this was happening made it so confusing and frustrating. I honestly didn’t even think what he was doing was wrong, because how could someone claim to love God so much, but be so wicked at the same time?”

As heart-wrenching as this situation is, this is just one example of the many, many tragic stories I’ve become aware of since starting SBNP.  I’m heartbroken for the victims, but so thankful that they are brave enough to share their story, at least with me. 

I close my post with these thoughts:

• I will continue to call out predators by name.
  Sheltered But Not Protected is dedicated to spreading awareness regarding abuse in all forms, especially when that abuse involves someone in authority taking advantage of the trust they’ve been given, only to use that trust to prey on the innocent. When I first began SBNP, I was hesitant to use specific names and locations, being careful not to call out any one individual or institution.  However, after calling out my abuser, Carol Lynn Mathia by name, I’ve decided that I will handle each case differently.  Each situation is different, and should be handled as such.  You can read more about the decision to call out my abuser here.
   
• I will continue to call out churches and institutions by name who victim shame and enable predators.
  Statistically, I was probably not Carol Lynn’s only victim, which is why I reached out to her pastor, Jason Crawford of Mt. Calvary Baptist Church in Belleview, Michigan. When Jason’s condescending response seemed more focused with the tone of my e-mail than the content, I wondered if Carol Lynn had found the next perfect cult minded church to prey in.  Up until that point, Jason had given me no confidence that he had taken the appropriate steps to ensure that Carol Lynn was being held accountable.  In fact, he made it clear, it was neither mine, nor anyone else’s business.    However, after calling him and his church out by name, Jason changed his mind.  Though through a third party, Jason admitted that he had indeed run a background check on Carol Lynn, had spoken to her previous pastor(s), and had counseled her.  Jason also threatened legal action against me if I didn’t take his name off of my blog/facebook page.  Poor Jason could have avoided so much publicity if he had just told me in private that yes, he was aware of Carol Lynn Mathia’s past, and that he was dealing with it accordingly. 
  

• VICTIMS- Keep speaking out!
  Statistically, you were one of many. This in no way lessens the severity of your abuse, it just means that your abuser might still be out there, preying on the vulnerable.  Speaking out is difficult, but your voice can make a difference in someone else’s life.  Being afraid or uncomfortable to expose your abuser is 100% understandable.  If you fall into that category, contact me at [email protected] and I’ll share on your behalf.